About 3 years ago the day before my 20th birthday my life was turned up side down. I was on some sort of spiritual path that I didn't realy understand. I was communicating with the dead, or so I thought and passing on all sorts of spiritual messages to people all around me. I was on some sort of spiritual mission to help the world and everyone in it. My thoughts and understanding of what was going on got a out of control and suddenly on that day before my birthday everything was literally taken away from me. Something trigered me and gave me belief that I was "the one" or some sort of holey being, and at that moment I saw my life flash before my eyes and I felt my sole leave me. I literally went from a charasmatic, funny, well rounded person to a confused, stupid, strange acting person. This sudden change was so profound and so intense that I thought something amazing, something wounderful had happened to me, and that I was right about everything I fealt. It didn't take me long, a few months, to realize something horrible had happened to me, and everything that was god gifted in my life was gone. my sense of humer, personality and even a general understanding of life was gone. Everything fealt so evil and I turned into such a strange dark and evil sole. Total opposite of everything I was used to. My life had been taken away from me. Over the past few years and everyday since I have thought about that day and what could have happened. It could be looked at from so many diffrent angles, spiritual, mental, scientific, biblical. I've been to see priests, hypnotists, phychologists, Dr.'s, psychics, spiritual healers, and I am constantly on the look for anything else that could shed some light or help me get my life back. So my question to you is, what do you think happened to me??? and even more, has anyone ever heard of anything like this? Does anyone have any suggestions as to what I should do, or what I should try, I'm willing to try anything. Thank you so much for those of you who made it to the end of this, I would love so much to get some insite and opinions on this. Thanks again Lindsay SHelton.
I have seen circumstances where people have been given abilities and they take the credit and feel they are "the one" and the gifts are shut down. As a medium myself I am always careful to remember that I am merely conveying the information that I receive to a recipient. I cannot take credit for the message. It is just my job to communicate it. If the message is for the general population then it is my duty to report what I am being told. Nothing will shut down this ability faster than ego and putting ones own interpretation on the message. If you are stating that it is your opinion and it is expressed separately from the message that is ok, since we all have a right to an opinion but the message should remain as pure as humanly possible.
Moving forward, please forget the notion that you are being punished and that your life has been taken away. Everyday is full of new opportunities and choices. Make positive choices that take you where you want to go next. Forget the past. Where do you want to go today and what do you want to contribute to your fellow man.
Press on! Bonnie Vent San Diego Paranormal Research Project www.sdparanormal.com
Bonnie, thank you for responding, and by the way I love that name. I totally understand about powers being shut down, that is exactly what I believe happend. But not only were my "powers" shut down, everything else was shut down. My natural "earthly" gifts that came with my life/brain. One of the biggest ones was my sense of humer. I went from being able to make anyone laugh, from any age and any background, to not having any rebuttle, witt, or understanding of the slightest joke. The only way I can explain it is that my personality was erased/shut down. My personality was my "power" and my gift. And I know what you mean about how I shouldn't feal like I'm being punished. But look at it this way. I ran around like a chicken with its head cut off, telling people what there dead relatives were saying, not even knowing if they realy were saying things, and with no reguard as to how that person would feal or act. Maybe I deserved it in the eyes of many including God. I know that God doesn't work like that, he doesn't punish people for their mistakes but what else am I to think? Something greater than me put me in check and I am paying for it dearly now. And if not that, then I did it to myself. either way my main concern today is, can I get it back? will it last for eternity? Is there anyone in this world that understands or can help me? I have let that day go in some ways, but have you ever done something wrong and you felt so bad you wish you could take it back? usualy things like that bug you for a few days or a few weeks until you finally make it right or realize the consequence isn't that bad and you can forget about it. Well now emagine that times 1000, but this time it's so bad that there is no fixing or undoing, and the consequence is so severe that it haunts you for the rest of your life. Again I thank you so much for responding and you have anymore insite I'd love to read it.
Last Edited by Lindsay Shelton on Nov 05, 2005 8:21 AM
You can't go back but you can go forward. Use your power of intention. What do you want to do today to be of service? If you need to apologize to people for past mistakes, make sure you do that. It will help you to forgive yourself. They use this method in AA and it is valid. You might just find out that you helped some people that perhaps you think you have hurt.
If you need some sort of ritual you can write down on small pieces of paper what you are upset about. Take the pieces of paper and tear them up and put them in a firesafe bowl and burn them until they are ashes. This symbolizes the release of the bad feelings so put all your emotions into this process. You need to clear out the past so that you can move forward.
There are some very difficult planetary influences this weekend so you might want to wait until Tuesday to speak to others about delicate subjects.
Blessings! Bonnie Vent San Diego Paranormal Research Project www.sdparanormal.com
It sounds to me that some very strong forces were at work from early on in your life. As such your personality developed arround and in response to those forces influence in your life. Eventually here came a time for "you". If these forces have retreated it is only for your benifit. Find yourself, the part of you that exists independent of this gift. Who are you with out higher forces. How can you make people laugh without being so connected to the parts of them other people dont see. Learn to live and love and laugh just as more ordianry people do and once you have developed the more earthly aspects of your personality there may be an opportunity for those forces you once relied on to return.
It sounds like a person who suddenly was no longer the center of attention. It's like an addition - any celebrity can tell you that. Kid stars go through it - they're held in high esteem for a few years of their lives, everyone loves them, they can do no wrong. Then bang! It's all gone. And the reaction is very similar to the one you had.
I would wager you suddenly became fearful of something, something that shut you down and that in turn removed you from the limelight. I know there isn't much of spirit in my message, but that's because it's meant to be direct and to the point.
Bonnie has given you great advice. Follow it. You are who you are today. You can make yourself better every day that follows. Your life is yours to live. Let go of the past, of the dread and most of all of the memories. They will drag you down. Look ahead, ask yourself what one little thing you can do today to make someone else and yourself happy? Just one thing, just one person, one day at a time. Try it! You'll find it empowering, encouragin and enlightening.
I read your post from Oct. 29th and may have another explanation of what happened to you. I've had a similar experience myself.
It sounds to me like you may have left yourself open to all kinds of bad stuff. Basically, you made yourself vulnerable and may have accidentally invited negativity into your life. I had a similar personality change soon after I quit going to church and got into witchcraft. People noticed the change in me before I did. I went from being a very caring and empathetic person, to being heartless, cruel, unloving, and extremely hateful person. I lost all my friends, my social life, and became very distant to my relatives.
After a few years of hating the world and everyone in it, I decided to make a change for the better. I started going back to church and accepted God back into my life. Ever since that day, things have gotten so much better for me. I'm currently going to college at Wichita State University and my life is going great compared to when I was into witchcraft. Like the Bible says; "any man who calls upon the name of the Lord shall be saved."
I hope this helps you some. Don't ever give up on yourself! Please let me know how things go for you.
Sea salt and epson salt bath not only helps clean toxins out of your body, It helps clean your energy field. praying and asking for protection and guidence is always helpful.When you close your eyes and relax picture in your mind an egg shape of white light around your body Try to look and see if there is anything in, on, or attached to your energy field.If there is you will have to get rid of it.Or get help to get rid of it, and I DON'T mean psychics that do curse removals for outrageous sums of money.I'm not saying psychics are bad or can't help.Just that is a typical rip off people fall for.
